Conversations with Heart & Mind

Thump… thump… thump… thump… thump, thump, thump, thump, thump, thump.

“Please Rebecca, I just want to know, can’t you just tell me? I just want to know.”

“What do you wanna know?”

“Is he happy? Like really, truly, genuinely happy?”

“Yeah, he’s happy. He’s doing what he loves. He has people that are there for him. He’s doing great in school. He’s happy.”

“Good, I’m glad. He deserves that, he deserves happiness.”

“Are you gonna be okay?”

“I’m going to be great actually. Everyone should have happiness, no matter who they are. Especially if it’s him. You and Mind thought of that right?”

“Yeah we did. I’m glad it went to you. Still like him?”

“Yeah, probably will never stop.”

“I’m proud that you, we don’t deny it any more.”

“Yeah, denial was only building up more denial. It was time to stop lying to myself.”

“I love you Heart. I’ll be here when you need me.”

“And I, you.”

…..

“Hey Rebecca?”

“Yeah, Heart?

“I still miss him.”

“I know.”

Sometimes you just stay missing people until you don’t anymore. Or until it gets better.

“Hey there’s Mind, dropping knowledge. Does he still have you thinking about him?”

Yep. Can’t ever forgot about him. His name is mentioned everywhere. He was in my dreams but I don’t know why.

“Sorry I think that was my fault.”

Hey, it’s ok Heart. I understand. I have to, it’s in my job description. It’s not any easier for me. I try to forget him every day but there’s no point. I can’t even forget him for 4 hours.”

“Moving on is not about forgetting it’s about learning.”

Hey Heart! That’s my job.

“Haha I know, but I wanted to give it a shot. Sometimes we need each other to find the right answers. With each other we can do it.”

Together. I don’t want to do this alone. Rebecca, are you still there?

“Yep, I’m always here.”

We figured out that we don’t want to do this separately.

“I think that was the problem before. We’ve been facing this separately. We’ve  been saving knowledge for you, Mind and feelings for Heart, when we should’ve been doing everything together. We should’ve worked step by step. Together is way better. Have I ever told you guys that I’m so scared that one of you will go overboard? That if I think about him too much I’ll go crazy. Or if I feel too much I might do something crazy. But the problem wasn’t feeling too much or thinking too much. The problem wasn’t you guys. It was me. I didn’t allow you to work together. I arranged you both to situations. When we should’ve worked together, not only concerning him but concerning all our problems.”

We still have the rest of our life to work on facing our problems together.

Our first mission?

“Him. You guys know that we don’t need him. We have our self to love.”

“Yeah, it’ll just take some time to heal from all his words and actions.”

Only a little bit of time.

“But time together.”

…..

“So Mind, Anything else we need to know before starting a new day?”

I know that it will get better.

“It will get better. I can feel it.”


Maybe “A Conversation with my Heart and Mind” should be a thing I start on my blog. It was really fun typing this up. At first it started with a Conversation with my heart. But I thought why not throw in my mind? Any thoughts on this? I’d love to know what you think, if I should continue this?

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Conversations with Heart & Mind

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s