I’m currently crying in a bathroom, and I don’t know why.
I don’t have anyone here.
I don’t know where to go or where to sit.
It feels like today I got dressed up for nothing.
Why am I like this?
I can’t ask anyone to sit with me.
There’s no one here.
Maybe this is part of my anxiety I don’t know.
What I do know is that I’m having another broken episode.
I can’t tell anyone.
How are you supposed to tell someone I wasn’t sitting anywhere I was in the bathroom crying my eyes out because I was too scared to ask someone if I could sit with them. I didn’t want to sit alone with a bunch of eyes looking at me. I didn’t want to tell my brother that I wasn’t sitting anywhere because he would just tell me to sit with an aunt or uncle, but I can’t do that.
I don’t want to sit with an aunt or uncle.
I just want to go home.
Where it’s safe.
My dad isn’t here.
I need my mom. But she’s getting help. I want her to get help, I need her to get help.
So I’m here crying in the bathroom, not even listening to the service because I don’t have anyone to sit with.
But I can’t tell anyone this because they wouldn’t understand why I didn’t just sit somewhere by myself.
They wouldn’t understand.
How can I live like this?
An hour has passed by.
An hour of me crying in the bathroom.
That’s going to haunt me for the rest of my life.