I H.A.T.E. Them

You know what I hate most in the world?

Something I hate more than hate itself?

And trust me I really hate hate.

Something I hate more than big crowds and presentations.

Something I hate more than not getting enough sleep.

Something I will always, completely, utterly hate for the rest of my life.

Bugs.

Yes, bugs.

I. H.A.T.E. T.H.E.M. (You know it’s serious when I start abbreviating regular words)

Why?

Just why?

Why do they exist?

What’s their purpose?

No, I don’t actually want you to tell me that bugs are essential to our human environment. Because I’ll hurt you. I’m sorry you know I love you, but I will hurt you.

Because I don’t care, I hate bugs.

Whether they’re helpful or not.

I mean I don’t mind bees, they help flowers grow. Flowers are beautiful. Bees are like “Hey if you don’t bother me, I won’t sting you into perpetual pain.” Bees won’t bother you if you don’t bother them. Cool? Cool.

But all these other bugs.

They’re just urghh, they’re unnecessary.

They bother you, they creep up on you. They somehow get into your home.

There are ants, spiders, cockroaches, flies, mosquitoes, those are the ones that I can think of off the top of my head.

Ants. They don’t do anything, but they’re annoying. They crawl around in herds whenever there’s food. They’re disgusting, just crowding around your picnic basket…. ugh.

Spiders. They create spiderwebs in corners or in the attic. They’re just so irresponsible, I get that they’re trying to trap some food or whatever, but do they really have to leave their remains? And their appearance… like really? They look like the spawn of my nightmares, why do they have to have so many legs? Has anyone ever watched the Mazerunner? The grievers? They looked like humongous spiders. Now you know why I freaked out when I saw one yesterday, then it just disappeared.

Cockroaches. They’re disgusting. They come out in the dark. They can be under your refrigerator. They multiply and multiply. You should call an exterminator immediately if there are cockroaches because you do not want them around every time you turn on the light. They’re disgusting, point made. What do they do for us? Nothing.

Flies. Flies don’t really do anything but pester you. They’re so annoying and small. Yes, you can fly, we get it, now fly out of here. Whenever there is a fly near you it always comes back… Why? I have no idea. It just bothers you for no reason.

Mosquitoes. Why? Just why? They’re like mini vampires. Except vampires don’t leave a bump on your skin that’s irritatingly annoying, they just kill you… Well, I guess mosquitoes kind of win the argument… anyway, they’re annoying. The annoying part is that you can never feel a mosquito on your skin when they’re sucking your blood, or at least I can’t. Why do they just take your blood? And now they carry a virus? I’m done with them. I was already done with them, but now I’m more done than done.

Bugs are just disgusting and unnecessary.

Why, just why?

Why can’t every specie die. I don’t want bugs. I don’t like them. I hate them.

I especially hate when a bug crawls on you. Even if it isn’t poisonous or blood-sucking, it’s still a bug. Like no, this is my body get off of it. Plus you don’t know where they’ve been. It’s just creepy and disgusting and ugh (I wonder how many times I’ve said that)

Once I saw this episode of Criminal Minds where the guilty person (the one who murders people and the person that the episode is centered around that the FBI have to find) killed his victims by putting them in a box and dumping poisonous bugs all over their body. Thank goodness I didn’t watch that episode alone, my cousin was there. But that is just so terrifying. I mean to have them all crawling on me.

Okaayyyy I don’t want visions of it now, so I’m going to end the post.

This is to bugs everywhere.

Why do you exist?

And why don’t you just mind your own business?

Build a home, get some food. Don’t crawl on me and come into my home.

Sincerely,

A bug hater.

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3 thoughts on “I H.A.T.E. Them

  1. Hello. How goes today?
    This post absolutely cracked me up. So you hate bugs that much, huh?
    I hate them myself. They are just so goddamn irritating.
    I swear. Mosquitoes and cockroaches for starters. God I hate them.
    Anyway. Take care and have a great day. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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