So I was a Candle Girl in a wedding!
It was kind of a late minute thing, or maybe it wasn’t and I was just told late. My cousin was getting married to a girl that he met through family members… but to be honest I didn’t know which cousin was getting married until the rehearsal…. anyway. So the wedding was today, but I’ve only known since the beginning of December when my Dad told me. I was really hesitant at first, because you know anxiety anxiety anxiety. But I really kinda wanted to do it, I mean to get that opportunity? Lighting candles? Sure I’m not doing anything better plus it sounded cool.
Well I didn’t hear anything from my aunt (my cousin’s mom) about the wedding until she came to my house on Wednesday and told me that the rehearsal would be that day.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is where the STRESS started.
I had so much anxiety:
- What if I burn the church down?
- What if I mess up?
- What if the other candle girl doesn’t like me?
- What if the candle burns out?
- What. If. I. Burn. The. Church. Down
I literally told all my friends I would burn the church down, of course as a joke, but that’s seriously how scared I was. It also didn’t help that the other candle girl has done this before so I was all alone in my what if feelings.
But that wasn’t the only thing.
I was so stressed about it because I literally just got it this past Wednesday. Once I saw it I really didn’t like it, I mean it was pink and it was a one shoulder dress and I’m not really comfortable about that plus it’s winter I mean… And once I put it on, I got kind of pissed. Because the measurement was wrong and it looked ugly at first and I just did not like it.
So of course I called Batman/Catwoman (she likes to be called Catwoman, I like to call her Batman because whenever I cry for help she’s always there for me) My AMAZINGLY AWESOME cousin who helps me with everything: chemistry, basic knowledge, everything literally said she would come with her mom to my house to fix the dress.
This ABSOLUTELY helped in my favor because that dress was literally my nightmare. But once my cousin came, her mom got to work. She literally did some kind of magic to fix it and it didn’t slip or anything. While her mom was doing that, my cousin helped me with my sad attempt of curling my hair. At the end, my dress turned out to not be so ugly and I looked so pretty, pretty enough to take a mirror selfie on snapchat.
But, of course, during all of this my whole family were stressing me out telling me that I was late and I had to hurry and my anxiety skyrocketed and I was in a messy rush. Well, when I got to the church the only people there, bridal party wise, were the flower girls and their mom. Everyone else came like an hour later… really? If my dad was here and not in India we would’ve come exceptionally and fashionably late like a regular Indian (Lol this is a joke. I’m sorry you have to know my family and their own “Indian Standard Time”
So in case you might not know, a candle girl is the person in a wedding who lights a candelabra at the stage. There are maybe 15 candles to light arranged like this:
So you have to march like the rest of the bridal party from the door to the stage of the church. But the candle girl has to hold this long pole thing? I have no idea what it’s called, but it’s long. It’s wayyy taller than me. But of course, pretty much everything is taller than me. Ok it’s like holding a flag or pretty much a long stick. On the top of the pole is a match which will light the candelabra, and you have to walk with the candle pole stick burning from the door to the stage. Now maybe you might be wondering, how does the match stay lit? Wouldn’t the match go out because of the wind or how fast I walked? Yep these were all my worries.
The other candle girl was really nice and she talked to me. She tried to tell me not to be nervous, but of course I can’t do that. I kind of made the mistake of going all the way aorund the stage when she went a different way, but at least I lit all my candles.
It was actually PRETTY COOL. To be given the chance to light such a precious thing as candles. I mean once you see the whole candelabra from afar with all the candles lit, it’s so beautiful. It was so cool to light the candle one by one I felt important for once, instead of being someone standing on the sidelines. It was also so beautiful just to light the candles… I don’t know maybe I have some weird fetish for lighting candles and it’s weird considering I lit the candles the day before my birthday. It’s like my send off of being a 16 year old. And once me and the other girl sat down we both gave each other a thumbs off from across the room, my anxiety felt ok.
Everything after that was thankfully stress-free. I hung out with the other candle girl and her cousin and they were really funny. She helped me be happy because she didn’t exclude me in stuff. I just felt like a third wheel kind of, because I didn’t really know the both of them so I didn’t know how to start a conversation… yep that’s awkward me.
BUT all in all everything turned out to be okay. I actually had a good time and it was a great experience to be a candle girl. For once, I felt like I was something more than my father’s daughter or my mother’s parrot (because I always follow her around at family functions). I don’t know if I sound egotistic, I don’t mean to, but it was just nice to feel important.